Writing assignment

Hi everybody,

The other day I was sorting out my papers and when I began reading through my old short stories I found this. Our teacher gave us a prompt and I decided to something different than I normally do. So here it goes. 

You know one of those mornings when everything goes wrong and then the rest of the day just goes crap. You wake up and half your hair lime green and there is nothing you can do about it. Then you get up and discover that the dog ate your pants and now you have to go with the pink ones that grandma gave you for christmas. Now you think it can’t get much worse, but yes it can. The cat has eaten everything in the fridge and freezer. She doesn’t like the food we bought her so she eats ours and we get… hers. So one bowl of cat food later you realize that time is going twice as fast as usual and it is actually seven thirty instead of six thirty. You grab your bag and throw on your jacket that for some reason has one baby-blue sleeve and one orange sleeve when the jacket was black yesterday. Out in the garge and you realize your bike has a flat tire. The only choice now is to take the bike that belongs your five year old brother and has Donald Duck stickers and training wheels. You peddle as fast as you can because maybe, just maybe, you will be able to get to school on time.

But halfway to school a jet lands in the middle of the road in front of you. You have no other option than to wait as an old has been rockstar that nobody remembers who has gotten into his head that he is going to perform a concert right then and there gets out of the plane. The cops show up but they don’t take him away, no, they stay to listen. 

As you finally arrive to school you have missed your first class, social studies, where the teacher has had a lecture on why so many politicians are fat. It is time for history and that teacher thinks it is the perfect time for an unprepared quiz on the hairstyles of Britney Spears. It is a crazy long quiz. Next it is lunch and there has been some kind of mix up so the choice is between dogfood or fishfood.

Next class is canceled because the teacher has mad cow disease. You get home and there has been a break in and a shit-load of things are missing but you don’t care. The TV is way more fun but the only thing on is TV-shop. How to get greener nails and flatter feet. 

Evening finally comes but mom is in prison, your five year old brother has ended up in Stockholm and your dad is having an affair with the librarian in the next room. You only want the day to end so you decide to go to sleep. The bed was stolen during the break in so you lay down on the floor. 

That was the kind of day I was having. Exhausted I took a deep breath because I thought it was all over. I was almost asleep. And God dammit don’t you think a truck crashes through the window and hits me. 

That is the story of how I got hit by a truck.

I hope you enjoyed this little bit of absurdity and until next time, bye!

//Anna